Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Day Fifty Three....

Somewhat irritating and expensive ride from D.C. to New York.

First off, got a late start (hadta sleep in and proceed to shower and pack and have brekker at Tipsy McStagger's at a far too leisurely pace) and ended up leaving Morseyboy's place circa 2:15pm.

Then, got onto the Jersey Turnpike and there was this mammoth-ass traffic jam like, about 50 miles from New York City.


COME ON!!! This is a TOLL ROAD!!!! Thee reason you take roads that you fucking have to PAY FOR (sorry – I'm a Westerner.....we don't have toll roads out there) is simply TO AVOID TRAFFIC!!!!

Cool....mega traffic jam AND I git the privilege of paying for it.....cute......

Thee best tolls though were where the State of Delaware figured: “
Ya know.....we got this teensy-weensy stretch of Interstate 95 slicing through thee very far Northern tip of our state. And ya know, it's so small, that it may cost, like five buxx a day to maintain it.....but since sooooooooo many people traverse I-95 daily, I have a very opportunistic idea – Why don't we create our own 'State of Delaware Turnpike Authority' and ding EVERYBODY a five dollar toll for riding on a brief, ten mile stretch of I-95 through Delaware!!! Nothing says that we can't do that......


THEN, I cross something called the Outer Limits bridge (or it was called
something like that, right next to the Twilight Zone Freeway) into Staten Island for EIGHT BUXX!!!

I mean, I have crossed some grand and spectacular bridges in my lifetime around the world.......but I've never paid eight dollars to cross anything in my life!! Especially a bridge as ordinary as this fucker......Jesus!!

Between the needless and incessant tolls, the traffic jams, and the late start, I FINALLY got into Brooklyn around 8:30PM. Caught up with 'Pitz (he and Beia had just relocated from L.A., and Beia was in Puerto Rico for work).....and he had New York City Pizza and Brooklyn lager on hand......shortly thereafter, I forgot about things such as tolls and traffic jams.

Christ.....just open up your front door holding food and beer, and I'll totally forget thee shittiest ride of my life, most likely!!

After several pints, 'Pitz and I walked around his Brooklyn Neighbourhood (somewhere near Flatbush, actually). FASCINATING stuff.........I mean, I had not been to New York City since 1992.....and even then, the five or so times that I'd been to NYC, I'd never set foot off of the island of Manhattan.....and honestly? I dislike New York City.

But....BUT.....Brooklyn was far easier to deal with and far more acceptable to me than Manhattan is. I mean, I love when planning publications and seminars and stuff like that talk about the term “mixed-use development” as though it was just invented two weeks ago. Come on, Brooklyn's been doing it for centuries now (as has Montreal, Boston, Philadelphia, etc.)......and it's actually neat to walk around and see that people don't shit their pants because their single-family detached dwelling happens to be next door to a multi-family building (in Beaverton, that starts wars.....literally).

Felt a bit dodgy about leaving The Helix out on the street, as is, unattended. Had creepy visions of it just being picked up and walked away with into the back of a truck! Even 'Pitz was concerned about leaving it be as is on the streets of, for thee first time, I dragged out the motorcycle handcuffs and found a no parking sign and locked it up.

'Pitz and The Helix.....

Handcuffed to the no-parking sign in Brooklyn.

Was still there, just fine, in the AM. Still, though....I DID actually sleep better....I mean, it IS New York City, the place where, back in the late 80's, I'd seen windows of cars with handwritten signs posted in them that stated “NO RADIO IN CAR”, soooo, naw, I wasn't really up for rolling the dice.......

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Funny shit.....I'll be back in Western New York during the Buffalo Homecoming (an attempt to lure people who departed for greener pastures BACK to Western New York)......believe me, this was NOT planned in this manner......

....but the irony is rich.

Tell ya what: Find me a job (based on MY MERIT AND EXPERIENCE, NOT based on the fact that I am good friends socially with the person in charge of hiring) paying more than six buxx an hour and bars that I can smoke INSIDE and I'll be back there to reside in a heartbeat!!!

Somewhere in the Adirondack Mountains of Northern New York State tomorrow.....


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