So, on the second day in Sapa.....
....decided to go crusing out of town a few miles. Saw a cheezy little waterfall and some H'Mong lean-tos along the side of the road that served as clothing shops but not much else of any real interest. Bought a couple gifts for the family back in Hai Phong and headed back into Sapa town.
Saw a brochure for some sort of "authentic" H'Mong village just outside of town called "Cat Cat Village". Figured I'd check it out forra laugh.
Got to the gate at the entrance to the village, paid 40,000VND (two bucks) entry fee, and rode into the village. Got about half a kilometer in and immediately saw that lovely authentic village feel....because we all know that counterfeit The North Face clothing has a long history in traditional H'Mong culture....
Got to the second gate, gave the guy my admission ticket, and thought that I was gonna go cruise down the road to the village. Instead, I was asked to park my skooter and instead walk down a steep stairwell to the village.
Cool! Right on.....then I looked down the stairwell......
Nice! The pathway leading to the "authentic" village just accidentally happened to be lined with little shops......hmmmm........
.....and the stairwell went on for about one kilometer......and so did the shops lining it on either side.
The locals who appeared to reside in this village didn't seem to be wearing the traditional garb of the H'Mong.....only about 40% of 'em were wearing such attire. DID see these weird loom thingies and a few people seriously doing handiwork on fabric, ACTUALLY CONTINUING TO DO THE HANDIWORK - NOT just simply doing it for show until the tourist passes and then stopping, so it appeared that they were indeed making at least some of the stuff they sell (at least partially dispelling a suspicious feeling I had about a lot of this stuff being mass-produced over the border in China).
Went down a bit further, and was about to turn back and say "Fuck it!" when I saw a sign for H'Mong apple wine. Being a big friend of both, apples and wine, I decided to have a go.
LOOKED and SMELLED like normal apple cider.....but thass about where the similarities ended. It tasted kinda like vinegar that had been triple-filtered through those socks you wore for 48 straight hours while climbing up Mt. Hood and topped with a dash of formaldehyde for an extra zing!
That was about it for me - hiked the kilometer back UP the steep stairwell (in the screaming sunshine - THAT sucked) and saddled up on my skooter and headed out back to my hotel......
All in all, it was amusing paying two bucks to explore things that you could see at the normal market in Sapa town. I guess if a few pot-bellied pigs and little kids begging (with signs clearly instructing you to not to give money to begging children) constitutes an "authentic village", then I prolly coulda done something similar for free in Appalachia.....
Still, though, it was what it was and wasn't REALLY trying to be something that it wasn't. I mean, I remember taking a walking tour of Acoma Sky City in New Mexico and having my jaw drop at the sheer amount of cheeze and bullshit that was in that tour, including the tour guide stating that the Acoma Nation is a Patriarchal society, like the Seneca Nation and a couple others that he mentioned. Funny part was is that all three nations that he mentioned are MATRIARCHAL societies. Also, we were not allowed near the church as it was "......a sacred spot for The Acoma People" - however, one member of our tour group did sneak behind the church......he saw a buncha expensive 4WD pickup trucks and a Cadilliac.
So yeah, the Cat Cat Village walk made me laff with its North Face authenticity....but the H'Mong ARE hurting (as are the Dao, the White Thai, and other ethnic minorities of Northwest Vietnam).....they ain't stowing Caddies, as I sadly witnessed on several occasions H'Mong elders garbage picking in Sapa town and also in Lai Chau....as Lao Cai is the second-poorest province in Vietnam, and Lai Chau Province leading the rankings as the poorest.
Woke up the next morning and asked the guy at the hotel about the town of Lai Chau....it APPEARED to be literally a speck on the maps, and being 75Km away from Sapa town going deeper into ethnic minority territory, I figured it would be an interesting trip and decided to spend the night there.
The guy at the hotel in Sapa told me that, yes, he's been there several times and, yes, there IS a hotel there and a couple cafes to grab beers at, and, yes, the road between Sapa and Lai Chau is good with no worries....just narrow in some spots. He DID mention that I should stay on the main roads.
"Why?" I asked
"Well, because, you're a Tay, and there have been issues there with the police harassing Tay because they thought that the Tay were missionaries, sooo......." he responded.
I didn't grasp WHAT the hell he was saying OR implying when it struck me........
OK - remember about a year ago? There was that totally batshit loonie crazy old guy in The States (can't remember his name) who led this bizarre cult-version of Christianity?? He said that the world was going to end on May-something, 2011?? Remember??
Well, apparently, he had a wide-ranging voice via radio, some power and some cash (a LOT of ca$h) and he spread his tentacles out globally, and one of the groups of people around the world who fell for this guy's bullshit were the ethnic minorities of Northwest Vietnam.
Soooooo.......like two days before this "event" was scheduled to happen, all of a sudden, all these Dao/White Thai/H'Mong folks started pouring out of their isolated mountain hamlets and into the city of Dien Bien Phu (I haf noooo idea why - guess they wanted to spend their last few days on Earth there)!
Now, the local Government and local Police see this and are, like, "What the FUCK is this??????" and they freaked and called in The Military. You can only guess how well THIS ended up (and, I'd put a link on here, but I had been told that the Canh Sat monitors this blog, so you is gonna hafta Google the approximate date of the event, Dien Bien Phu and a coupla other keywords like "ethnic minorities" and you can get details that way. Obviously, this wasn't printed in the local papers here).......
Soooo.....I hopped on my skooter and went to go explore Lai Chau......
More tomorrow,
-E-
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